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Beach Lifeguard
- Must understand that the flag communication used to relay messages between guard towers is available for more than lifeguard purposes. Feel free to talk shit about the beach goers.
- Must know CPR. Or at least know what it looks like. People are less likely to sue you if you look like you tried your best to save their child's life.
- Must wear the traditional white stuff on your nose.
- Must understand that you will not be working with Pamela Anderson nor anyone that resembles her.
- Must not base whether or not to perform mouth to mouth resuscitation on the victim's activeness.
- Must try to convince everyone that rip tides kill everyone. Even people outside of the water.
- Must never use a fake shark sighting to take a break. Unless of course you need to use the bathroom. Then it's perfectly acceptable. Hey, when you gotta go, you gotta go.
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